‘My in-laws picked my baby name and announced it in paper before I could say no’

A soon-to-be mum says she was left stunned after her husband’s family announced the name of their child in the newspaper – without consulting the parents first.

The woman said she was overjoyed to find out that she is expecting her first child early next year, and she and her partner are yet to decide on a name for their baby.

But during her pregnancy, there has been a death on her in-law’s side of the family and they posted an obituary in the local newspaper.

In the announcement, the family mentioned that there was also a little one on the way and included a name for the unborn child, despite the woman never having previously discussed it with them.

She said the name was previously on the shortlist – but the experience has now put her off using it (stock image)
(Image: Getty Images)

She wrote on Slate : “The problem is that we haven’t named our little one. This gesture, while I’m sure kindly meant, was really bizarre and surprising.

“The name they wrote is indeed a contender on the middle name list (although this has really soured me on the name altogether).

“This also rubs me the wrong way because we have been really open with the family that we are strongly considering giving the baby a name from my (non-English) first language.

“I doubt this was meant to strong-arm us into a name, and more a strange reaction to grief, but the entitlement still irks me.”

She asked for advice on how to handle the situation and it sparked a strong reaction from others on social media.

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One commented to say: “If they are this entitled now imagine how bad they will be when baby is born. Grieving doesn’t give you the right to impose on others. Take many many steps back and don’t talk about names with them ever again.”

A second wrote: “People do weird things when they are grieving. Your child is still yours to name. I’d suggest ignoring it and moving on.”

Another added: “What does your spouse have to say about this? As long as the two of you are in sync, it’ll all be fine. If anyone needs to bring this up with the in-laws, it’s not you.”

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